From personal experience of being a teen once, and from having a teenager and a tween, I can certainly say that the teenage years can be the most trying years of all. As a teen, you go through so much including your hormones running loose, your first love interest, possible breakups, gaining and losing friends, first jobs, exams, and what to do next with your life as you approach 18. And, this is just the beginning.
Having already been through this chapter in life, it has become so important for me to ensure that I help my children successfully navigate their teenage years and beyond. With this in mind, below are a few tips from personal experience on how to help your teenager navigate life.
Support Them, But Don’t Smother Them
First things first. Support your teenager, but don’t smother them. The hard fact is that, as parents, they don’t won’t want us involved in every part of their life. For example, I am so used to being involved in everything with my youngest son that I keep wanting to do that.
He’s not that small little boy that I used to head to the park with anymore.
Recently, as he entered 7th grade, he clearly tells me that he doesn’t want me there. He didn’t want me coming to Family Day, nor did he want me chaperoning an upcoming field trip.
He explained, that he loved me, but, he just doesn’t want me as involved as I have been – which is painfully fair.
With this in mind, we can let them know that we love them and support them, but allow them the space that they need to grow.
Allow Them Space to Grow and Figure Out Themselves
Although the words of my son explaining he didn’t want me involved as much stung, he’s only asking for space to grow and figure out who he is. Right now, he’s figuring out his interests, exploring new activities and events, new friendship groups, music, etc.
And, while some of this may be scary for me as a parent, I have to have faith that he will do the right thing, and learn and grow in the process.
As a parent, we have to let them explore a bit, so that they can figure out who they are and who they want to become. And, while we want them to always choose better options, they may very well want to explore things that we are not fans of such as dying their hair, different styles of clothing, getting piercings, and/ or tattoos.
While we may not be a huge fan of their choices, we can set guidelines and rules, and even put in place ways we can support their interests. For example, my oldest son has been asking for a tattoo. So, instead of saying, no, I gave him an age requirement and told him that I would go with him for his first one. Doing this allows for him to feel more accepted and supported.
And, the same thing goes for if he were interested in piercings. I would again, give him an age requirement and then go with him the first time (hopefully the last).
I know many parents who wouldn’t support this, but if you do, just find a way to support them, even if it’s just going shopping with them to find the best quality jewelry for their piercings. For example, Urban Body Jewelry offers a wide selection of labret jewellery that can be purchased online from the comfort of your home together.
Don’t Forget the Basics
I’m sure we could go on and on about allowing teens to explore and find themselves, however, there are just some things we as parents can’t skimp on…and that’s the basics.
While they are exploring and “finding themselves”, we still have to make sure that they are getting the right amount of sleep, making sure that they are eating healthy and drinking plenty of water, making sure that they are getting to their well-visits and dental visits, and making sure that we help them exercise and keep as fit as possible. While these are just a few of the basics, I’m sure you could come up with several more.
Final Thoughts
Helping your teenager navigate their life may not be the easier thing to do, but with a few tips and tons of support, we can definitely help them. Wouldn’t you agree?
